Making sense of family mediation: Quiz

If you're going through a separation or divorce, you're likely come across family mediation at some stage. Your ex or your solicitor might suggest you try it, or the court might require you to think about using it, to sort out practical arrangements relating to your children, your home and your finances. Check out how much you know about family mediation by completing our quiz below.

Questions

• 1. What does the mediator do?

A: Listens to both side of the story and then decides what's best for you and your ex.

B: Sits back and lets you and your ex sort everything out between you. They'll only get involved to calm things down when they get heated.

C: Helps you to work out what issues you need to think about and smoothes the progress of your discussions so you can decide for yourselves what will work best for you.

• 2. Is everything you say during the mediation sessions confidential?

A: No. Anything you say during mediation can be used as evidence in future negotiations and court hearings.

B: Yes, nothing that you say during mediation will go further than those four walls.

C: It is confidential, but if there's any risk of harm to anyone, especially a child, it will need to be reported. The financial information you have provided can also be used by solicitors and the court later on if the mediation doesn't work out.

• 3. If you go to mediation do you still need to get legal advice from a solicitor?

A: There's no need for legal advice if you go to mediation.

B: No, the mediator will give you both all the legal advice you need.

C: Yes, the mediator can give you general information about legal and court procedure but both of you should still get some legal advice about your particular situation.

• 4. How does mediation compare with the costs of getting a solicitor to negotiate an agreement for you or going to court?

A: It's more expensive.

B: It's much cheaper.

C: It's cheaper if you can get legal aid. Otherwise it depends on your situation and whether or not you manage to reach an agreement at the end of the mediation.

• 5. Splitting up with your partner is very stressful, but will mediation make it more or less stressful than getting a solicitor to negotiate for you or taking your case to court?

A: It's much more stressful because you have to talk to your ex face-to-face and work things out together.

B: It's less stressful because mediation is much more informal than going to court.

C: Both of the above. Going to mediation means you can probably avoid the worry of going to court but talking about difficult issues with your ex after a break-up can be really hard.

• 6. If you're feeling very upset and emotional about a separation, should you go to mediation?

A: No, you can't go to mediation unless you have already got over the break-up.

B: Yes, it will help you come to terms with the break-up.

C: You can try mediation if you want to make arrangements for the future. But you should also think about going to see a counsellor, to help you deal with your feelings about the end of your relationship.

• 7. Is mediation suitable for you if your ex has been violent towards you in the past?

A: No, you should always get a solicitor to negotiate for you, who may even take your case straight to court.

B: Yes. Mediators are trained to make sure you can talk freely and are not put under any pressure by your ex.

C: Probably not. You must get legal advice about how best to protect you and your children. But, if you are interested in the possibility of mediation, you can have a meeting with a mediator on your own to work out whether you would be safe and comfortable.

Click to see the Answers.

Advicenow
May 2006