If you have children
When it comes to sorting out where the children should live, how often you should each see them and how you will ensure they maintain a close relationship with both of you, you are in the same position as married couples.
It is always difficult but you do have to try to ensure the break up affects your children as little as possible. You should try to come to an agreement yourselves, before involving the courts - consider using a mediation service if it’s proving difficult. You may find the government's parenting plan very useful - it is designed to help you make arrangements for your children, and to help you discuss the issues with them - see 'Links to other websites'.
If there are any issues of domestic violence, or violence towards the children, you should get legal advice.
Family Mediation
Family mediation is often particularly useful in helping couples who are splitting up come to arrangements about the children. You can use a family mediation service as soon as you have made the decision to end your relationship, or at a later date if there are still outstanding problems.
Couples referred to mediation by a solicitor may be eligible for legal aid to cover the costs. See our Family Mediation pages for more details, or to listen in on a mediation session with our podcasts.
You are both financially responsible for your own children. If the children don’t live with you, you should pay child support. You do not have to pay child support for your partner’s children unless you have adopted them.
If the children are living with you and you would like to use the Child Support Agency to get child support, or if you have been told that you must use the CSA (because you receive Income Support or income-based Jobseekers Allowance) you should see an adviser. Contact your local advice agency or CAB.
Whether you are moving or not, it is a good idea to tell your children’s teachers the new situation. They need to understand what is happening as the situation at home may make a difference to your child’s behaviour in the short-term.
See the Children section for more information.
